April Fool’s Day

So, it’s April Fool’s Day again and the pressure is on to come up with something clever to confuse and confound the kid when she wakes up today.  Last year, I completely filled her dresser drawers with toilet paper rolls, so this year I have to top that.  But I only remembered what today was at 11:30pm last night, so whatever it was it was going to be had to be quick and easy to organize.  Fortunately, I found a clever prank on line.

First of all, it’s my opinion that every good prank worth doing has to encompass poo in some fashion.  Why?  Because I’m a guy and she’s nine-years-old and poo is rightfully considered as considered as funny and, therefore, totally prank worthy.  You may not share the same sentiment but, hey, we have a healthy respect for poo in this house.  What can I say?

So the premise of the gag is to create a fake poo and leave it somewhere where she is sure to stumble across it.  Now, you can create fake poo pretty easily out of a wide variety of materials laying around the house, but this one is pretty simple and easily crafted out of an empty toilet paper rolls which, fortunately, we have a lot of.  You can never have too many empty toilet paper rolls laying around in my opinion.

Anyway, here’s the gag:

1.  Soak a toilet paper roll in water until it’s good an moist.


2.  Shred the wet toilet paper roll into little pieces.


3.  Bunch up the shredding pieces into your hand and squeeze tightly to drain of excess water.


4.  The compressed shreds should resemble a piece of poo.  Well, to the unsuspecting eye anyway.


5.  Leave the fake poo laying around somewhere to be discovered.  In this case, I left it on her toilet seat knowing she would inevitably be up for an early morning bathroom stop.


6.  Hilarity hopefully ensues, or at least a little shrieking anyway.

Of course, the cats had the last laugh this morning when they left their own April Fools prank outside the laundry room in the way of the grossest fur ball I’ve ever laid eyes on, the little buggers.  So, yeah, I was upstaged by a feline.

God Help Me!

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