In light of recent plight with the dreaded Baby Shark song, I have decided to take matters into my own hands. Namely, I’m going to educate this child on decent music if it kills me. I realize that she’s only eight years old and wants to groove to whatever current pop crap pabulum is being spoon fed to her over the air waves but, seriously, there’s more to life than what they play on the 101.1 Z101 FM station she listens to in her mom’s car. Not to mention the fact that I also overheard her singing along to the Stag Shop jingle on the radio the other day from the back seat (click HERE to listen). Lord knows, I don’t have to explain why that’s disturbing, do I?
I’m not trying to say that she has to enjoy what I enjoy because, Lord knows, I enjoy just about everything (current pop crap and baby shark songs exempt, of course). I’d just like her to experience a little more of real music – you know, broaden her horizons – and maybe, just maybe, form an opinion or preference of her very own totally void of peer pressure. For example, my earliest recollection of ‘jazz’ music involved Fred Flintstone performing as the ‘Golden Smog’ with Hot Lips Hannigan. Later, my universe expanded with the Louis Armstrong-like scat jazz ‘Manamana’ on the Muppet Show.
Remember that? Here’s a reminder:
Good shit, right? But here’s the kicker: HRH liked it too, just as I did back then. Hmm.
So this gets me thinking: what other avenues can I explore to introduce her to other musical genres that I enjoy like blues, bluegrass, folk, jam bands, (old) country, etcetera and so forth? And where else to launch this pre-emptive strike, but in the safe confines of the last known environs where I am truly master and own all the undisputed power: my truck. Yes, in the truck on the way to camp, or to the pool, or shopping, or wherever, she’s 100% victim to whatever it is that I want to subject her to <<insert evil laugh and a furious rubbing of palms here>> or, just click HERE.
So, I’ve been giving it lots of thought as to what tunes in my vast collection of totally awesome music might appeal to an eight-year-old girl, besides the Muppet’s that is. Here is what I’ve come up with:
- Kooks – David Bowie (Bowie’s cute ditty for his newborn son from the 1971 ‘Hunky Dory’ album)
- Blurred Lines – Jimmy Fallon, Robin Thicke & The Roots (I know this is a pretty mainstream song and a recent YouTube hit but, hey, how can any self-respecting eight year old not love a tune played entirely on instruments that might have been culled from her own toy chest? Oh yeah, mostly importantly, this version has been cleaned up of all the references to bitches, ho’s, rape, and what have you)
- Being Around – Evan Dando (With lyrics involving eating boogers, this is sure to be an immediate hit)
- Dance Hall Days – Wang Chung (It’s Wang Chung, nuff said)
- Contact – Phish (Shit, it’s one step away from ‘The Wheels on the Bus’ as it is)
- Friday, I’m In Love – The Cure (May as well wean her on it now, before she figures it out for herself in high school and adopts all the black make-up and hair dye in high school)
- Mama Tooted – Keller Williams (Hey, some songs don’t need any explanations plus, it’s Keller Williams. How can you go wrong?)
- Steal My Kisses – Ben Harper (This song is about a boy trying to steal kisses from his girlfriend, and I figure it’s not long before she has a pre-pubescent stalker of her own, so I may as well have fun with it now before I have to purchase a shotgun and a rocking chair)
- Jenny Jenkins – Jerry Garcia & David Grisman (Because I couldn’t consider myself a respectable Deadhead without including at least one Jerry Garcia track)
- Barabajagal – Donovan (It’s catchy. It’s hip…and it has Jeff Back playing on it! She’ll thank me later in life)
- Village Green Preservation Society – The Kinks (Hell, even the title reads like a kids song)
- Shake It Up – The Cars (this was already a hit with her if not only for my ‘dancing fingers’ on the steering wheel whenever it comes on the radio)
- Georgie Buck – Carolina Chocolate Drops (They have a jug player in the band. What’s not to love?)
- Late for School – Steve Martin (Totally relatable for every kid, right?)
- Phantom Limb – The Shins (It’s like a way cooler Beach Boys that even I can enjoy after a dozen or so listens)
- Heavy Medal Drummer – Wilco (Because I think everyone could use a little more Wilco in their lives. Eight year olds included)
- Pick a Bale ‘o Cotton – Leadbelly (Besides having a totally kid-like flavor to it, it’s performed by a certain blues legend that NEEDS to heard and appreciated)
- Funky Bluesy ABC’s – Taj Mahal (See above)
- Chicken Train – Ozark Mountain Daredevils (How can you not love a song about chickens and trains
If you have any other suggestions for similarly fun – good – music that might befit an eight-year-old girl, I’m all ears. Lay it on me!